When someone passes away, we often hold onto their photos, keepsakes, and special memories. These help us remember who they were and what mattered most to them. But there’s another powerful way to leave a legacy—one that speaks to the heart: an ethical will.

Unlike a legal will, an ethical will isn’t about finances or property. It’s a deeply personal document where you can share your values, beliefs, life lessons, and hopes for future generations. Think of it as a time capsule filled with your wisdom—a meaningful gift your loved ones can return to again and again.

What Should You Include?

There’s no one “right” way to write an ethical will. It doesn’t need to follow a strict format. Some are written like journals or love letters, others as collections of stories or even a series of life lessons. The most important thing is that it feels true to you.

Choosing a Format

To get started, ask yourself a few guiding questions:

• Do I want to write one letter to everyone or separate ones for different family members?

• Should I write chronologically or by theme?

• Would I prefer a formal tone or something more casual and conversational?

• Do I want to include quotes, photos, or keepsakes?

Remember, your ethical will can grow and change over time. It doesn’t have to be perfect or finished—it just needs to be honest and heartfelt.

What to Write About

Here are a few categories to help guide your thoughts. You can write as much or as little as you'd like in each section:

My Beliefs and Values

• The values I’ve always tried to live by are…

• What faith or spirituality has meant to me…

• Causes or missions I’ve been passionate about…

• How I define success…

My Favorite Things

• My favorite place on Earth…

• Books, movies, or songs that shaped me…

• My go-to comfort food or favorite recipes…

• Hobbies I’ve loved and why…

Reflections on Family

• What I learned from my parents or grandparents…

• The most important thing I learned from being a spouse or parent…

• Childhood stories and family traditions I hope are remembered…

Career and Life Lessons

• My most rewarding (or most challenging) job…

• A turning point that changed the course of my life…

• If I could do it all over again, I might have…

My Life Experiences

• A memory I hold closest to my heart…

• One of the hardest decisions I ever made…

• Someone who made a lasting impression on me…

• Something I’m most proud of…

• A lesson I had to learn the hard way…

Hopes for the Future

• My hopes for my children, grandchildren, or future family…

• The values I hope you carry with you…

• A mistake I hope you avoid…

• Something I hope you never forget about me…

Sharing and Preserving It

Once your ethical will is written (or in progress), consider how you’d like to share it. You may choose to:

• Print and give a copy to close family members

• Include it with your estate documents

• Create a video version and record yourself reading it aloud

• Add to it each year as a living document

No matter how you share it, be sure to create a printed copy. Technology changes quickly, and a physical version ensures your words can be passed down reliably.

Start Now—Your Story Matters

It may feel like something to do later, but now is the perfect time to begin. Even a short letter or a handful of memories can become a treasured part of your legacy.

Whether you’re leaving life advice, favorite memories, or just words of encouragement, your ethical will offers a lasting connection to the people who love you most. You don’t need to be a great writer—you just need to be yourself. Your voice, your experiences, and your wisdom are more valuable than you may think.

If you’d like help getting started or have questions, the team at Ryan Funeral Home is always here for you.